Heart of Hope Read online

  Regardless of her concerns, it didn’t take long for Josh and Jenna to begin seeing each other regularly. In spite her plans to stay focused on her career and his vow to avoid involvement in a committed relationship, they couldn’t stay away from each other.

  Spring progressed to summer as he took her to plays and concerts. They visited museums and art galleries, savored meals at bistros, strolled through parks, and wandered through some of the most exclusive boutique shopping districts in town. They dined and danced, enjoying all the urbane adventures the city had to offer.

  He took her to a few family gatherings an hour away in Tenacity, Oregon, where he learned Jenna didn’t possess any enthusiasm for country life. Josh grew up in the small rural community where his family maintained their agricultural roots. He enjoyed the trips home. It gave him an opportunity to savor deep breaths of clean air, hear the birds chirp, and look out over miles of fields without a single skyscraper in sight.

  One weekend, he drove with her to Seattle to meet her family and see where she had grown up in the midst of all the cultural charms offered in the city. Jenna embraced the excitement and hustle, the steady motion of moving crowds, the sounds of traffic, and the smells wafting in from the waterfront. There was no doubt in his mind she was a city girl.

  On a warm Saturday in early fall, Josh asked Jenna to go for a drive and told her to dress casually. They headed out of Portland, enjoying the sunny day and one another’s company.

  Jenna assumed they were going to visit Josh’s family and he made no effort to correct her. He had other plans. Big plans. They were nearly to the road to turn toward his sister’s house when he pulled off the highway onto a paved road. They drove for a few miles before turning down a gravel road.

  Josh drove up to a dilapidated farmhouse and stopped the car.

  He hurried around to the passenger side, opened her door, and gave Jenna his hand. She stepped out of the car, appearing cute and casual in a pair of jeans and sneakers. Clearly curious, she looked around.

  “What are we doing out here, Josh?”

  Fully aware of her aversion to dust, dirt, and anything rural or remotely countryfied, he offered her an encouraging smile and squeezed her hand. Jenna gave him a long, studying glance, as though she just noticed he was dressed in faded jeans, scuffed boots, and a western shirt instead of the suits she was accustomed to seeing him wear.

  “Josh? What’s going on? Why are we here?” she asked, frowning at the derelict house and ramshackle barn in the background.

  “I’ve got something I want to ask you and something I need to tell you.” Nervously, he removed the ball cap on his head and ran a hand through his thick black hair.

  As he stared into her mesmerizing brown eyes, Josh tried to remember the speech he’d worked so hard to prepare but couldn’t bring to mind a single word. Determined, he put his hat back on and took her hands in his. Without his speech, he decided to speak from his heart.

  “Jenna, you may or may not know how much I’ve come to dislike living in the city. I hate the crowds, the traffic, the noise, the superfluous trappings and activities. I can’t breathe there anymore. I knew all along that I didn’t want to be a car salesman forever. It was just a means to an end. A way to save money until I figured out what I want to do with my life. Now I know.” Josh gazed at Jenna with a pleading expression that begged her to understand.

  “I had no idea how much you hated your life in the city,” Jenna said, genuinely surprised. “I suppose you’ve mentioned some things in the past and I may not have paid as much attention as I should have. Do you really dislike Portland so much?”

  “I do.”

  “But, Josh, things have been so perfect these past months. Like my perfect dream of the perfect romance.”

  “I’m glad to hear that, Jenna,” he smiled at her with tenderness, struggling to hold onto his courage. “You see, I… um…”

  “If this is your way of breaking up with me, you sure picked a rotten, pathetic place to do it,” she said, flapping a hand at the house behind them.

  He couldn’t believe she’d just suggested he’d dragged her all the way out here to end their relationship. “I’m not breaking up with you. Just the opposite.”

  She eyed him warily. “Go on.”

  “You’re a straight-shooter, you tell it like it is, so I’m going to do the same.” Josh willed his heart to stop pounding as he shared his dreams with the woman he had come to love. “I can’t keep living in the city. The one place in this world where I am happiest is outside, in the country. This may come as a shock, but I want to farm. I want to live here, where it’s peaceful, where the air is clean, where I can hear myself think. I want to buy this land, this very piece of land we are standing on, build a house and a barn, and farm.”

  Jenna’s eyes grew wide and her mouth formed a perfect “O” as she stared at him like he’d started speaking in languages she didn’t comprehend.

  When she regained the ability to speak, she narrowed her eyes and shook her head. “Does this have anything to do with the two weeks when you came back here during the summer?” Jenna referred to the time Josh spent helping his brother-in-law’s family during wheat harvest.

  Every year, he took time off work to help. He finally realized he enjoyed those two weeks of hard work more than anything else he did the rest of the year. Josh liked the physical labor, the smells, the sounds, everything about it. This year after harvest, when he returned to his job and life in Portland, he couldn’t stop thinking about how much he really wanted to farm.

  “Yes, Jenna, it does. It helped me figure out what I really want to do with my life. I want to work the land, out in the fresh air, and live life as a farmer.” Josh prayed Jenna would at least try to understand why he needed to make this life-altering change. “But there is more than that.”

  “More?” Jenna questioned, looking at him as though he’d gone off the deep end and lost his mind. He could almost see her thinking only someone completely mad would plan to abandon a fruitful career to be a farmer, of all things.

  Mindful of the questions and doubt on her face, Josh had to plunge ahead or face losing the best thing that had ever happened to him.

  “I not only want to buy this land, build a house, and try my hand at farming, but I also want you here beside me.” Josh dropped down on one knee and pulled a small velvet box from his pocket. When he opened the lid, a beautiful diamond glittered in the sunlight. “Jenna, I love you. I love everything about you. I’m deeply, madly, and completely in love with you. Will you please marry me?”

  Still down on one knee, Josh waited for Jenna to say something, anything. Instead, she stared at him and the ring while tears gathered in her eyes.

  Caught completely off-guard by his declaration and proposal, Jenna couldn’t think let alone speak.

  He wanted to marry her.

  That was the only part of the entire crazy conversation penetrating the fog in her brain.

  Slowly nodding her head, she took Josh’s free hand in hers and gave it a tug. He stood and slipped the ring on her finger then gave her a kiss that made her forget everything. In his arms, she found the one place in the world where she truly belonged.

  Regardless of her misgivings, Jenna was about to make peace with all things rural and become a farm wife.

  The country boy had won her city girl heart.

  Chapter One

  Six and a Half Years Later

  Josh Carver kept an eye on the hay he swathed as it fed into the front of the machine. He loved the smell of fresh cut hay, loved to watch a field fall into neat windrows as he went through an honest day’s work as a farmer.

  The best thing he’d ever done was purchase the farm and quit his job in Portland as a luxury car salesman.

  Correction. The second best.

  The single best thing he’d ever done was convince Jenna Keaton to become his bride. It had taken no small amount of effort on his part.

  Even though she agreed to marry him, she
decided she would never, ever adjust to life as a farmer’s wife. She called off their engagement three times before Josh convinced her she could continue to work in the city. He promised to take her to plays and concerts. He even refrained from burning his suits so he’d have something to wear when they attended one of her aunt and uncle’s parties.

  After resigning from his position at the car dealership, he traded in his sports car for a new extended cab pickup and a used flatbed truck. Josh poured his savings into the land he purchased right after he proposed to Jenna.

  He added a shop so he could start making repairs and progress on the land. As soon as spring arrived, work began on the house. It was finished just a few months after their wedding before the first hard frost that fall. The next additions were a barn and storage shed followed by a hay shed.

  When the fifteen acres at the end of their road came up for sale, Josh purchased it, giving them nearly five hundred acres of hay and wheat ground as well as pasture for the herd of registered Hereford cattle he worked diligently to build.

  The business of farming proved more of an investment than Josh anticipated. Although he owned the land and structures, it took a sizeable loan to purchase the farm equipment he needed, and that was buying everything used. He started a custom haying business on the side. The income from that helped whittle away the debt.

  Before they wed, Jenna declared not one penny of her hard-earned money would go into the farm. She insisted they maintain separate banking accounts and nearly separate lives. She kept her apartment, refusing to leave until the new house was completely finished.

  If Josh wanted to see her, he did so on her terms. For months, he commuted to Portland, eager to be with his bride. The day they moved into the spacious new home, almost a year after he proposed, Jenna’s resistance to the farm began to waver.

  As Josh started spring farm work and tried to find ways to involve her, she became more interested in the farm. The newborn Hereford calf he gave her for Easter that spring obliterated her resolve to stay out of the farming business. She merged their accounts and, in so doing, finally committed to fully entwining their hearts and lives.

  Josh grinned as he thought about his wife. She’d gone from her manicured nails, high heels, and a fear of all things rural to being able to drive the tractor, set irrigation water, and wear ugly rubber boots and a ball cap without having a meltdown.

  Jenna learned to put up with the dust and dirt of country life and became a real help to him as he pursued his dreams.

  Not that she’d given up her own dreams. She poured herself into her career and it paid off. Recently promoted to a training and development specialist for the state, Jenna would travel extensively in her new career, visiting various branch offices throughout Oregon while training individuals and offering support services.

  Her first trip in the position was to Washington D.C. for three weeks of training before she assumed full duties of the new position. It nearly doubled her salary, but Josh wasn’t sure he could get used to her being gone so often.

  She was due back tomorrow afternoon and he’d missed her tremendously. Although she occasionally traveled with her former position, gone for a day or two at a time, he would never get used to having her away for days on end. Three weeks was approximately twenty days more than he wanted to think about her being gone. The house and farm seemed so lonesome without her there.

  He glanced across the road, proud of the house he built for his bride. Painted light tan with dark red shutters and white trim, the Dutch-gabled farmhouse looked homey and inviting with a deep porch and wide front steps. An attached garage kept Jenna out of the weather and her car relatively clean.

  When they moved into the house, Josh half-jokingly told Jenna he planned to fill every one of the upstairs bedrooms with babies.

  She glared at him as though he’d physically struck her. “No kids, Josh. I can’t do kids and a career. I just can’t,” she said and walked away.

  He supposed children, or her lack of interest in them, might have been a good topic to discuss before they got married. Nevertheless, he figured when the time was right, Jenna would come around. He’d been patient, waiting for just the right time to broach the subject again, but in the past five years, the time hadn’t seemed right.

  Since they were both in their mid-thirties, he hoped to make some headway soon. However, Jenna’s new job would definitely put a damper on his baby-making plans.

  Lost in his thoughts, Josh jolted back to reality when the swather made a loud clunking noise, indicating a problem. He shut down the machine and climbed out of the air-conditioned cab, closing the door to keep the cool inside. It took him no time to dig out a plug then look to make sure everything else was in good working order.

  He found a piece of barbed wire wrapped around the sickle bar and gently tugged it loose. Annoyed, he wondered how many years it would take before he finally picked up all the junk the previous owners randomly tossed out around the place.

  One field on the back of the original homestead had been full of golf balls. He didn’t want to know how they came to be there, but his nieces, Audrey and Emma, had a great time running around picking them up in baskets like Easter eggs. He still occasionally unearthed one when he irrigated the field.

  Tin cans, metal scraps, and old appliances scattered across another field. He hauled truckload after truckload off as scrap metal before he could work and plant the ground. It was no wonder he got such a great price on the place.

  His family jumped right in and helped him clean up the unbelievable mess the former owners left behind. His sister, Callan, and her husband, Clay, provided hours and hours of free labor along with equipment borrowed from Clay’s parents who owned one of the biggest ranches in the area. Clay’s cousin, Jake, often came and lent a hand, as did Josh’s dad, Big Jim.

  Josh didn’t give too much thought to the fact his older brother, Bob, had yet to set foot on the place. Bob was nineteen years his senior and Josh had never liked or respected the man. The less he saw of Bob, the better. He and his wife, Donna, weren’t the kind of people anyone enjoyed being around.

  When Josh first introduced Jenna to his family, she and Callan hit it off immediately. Now, they were close friends and often planned fun activities together. Clay and Josh had been friends for years and, as Josh learned about farming, he appreciated the experience and wisdom his brother-in-law offered.

  Carefully climbing out from under the machine, Josh took off his ball cap and gloves, setting them on the swather step. He tugged off his T-shirt and wiped at the sweat streaming down his face and chest. It was certainly warm for early May. With a mild winter and an early spring, the hay had been ready to cut earlier this year than usual.

  Hot and thirsty, Josh wished he’d remembered to bring along something to drink. Rather than take a break, he decided to get back to work and finish this field along with one at the end of their road today. He wanted to have plenty of time to spend with Jenna when she arrived home.

  He swiped his soggy shirt across his face and looked across the road again. A profusion of colorful flowers bloomed in baskets hanging from the porch and in beds along the front of the house. He promised Jenna he would faithfully water her flowers while she was gone and so far had only forgotten to water them twice. Although he had farming in his blood, Jenna had gardening in hers. He willingly gave her full credit for doing all the work in the yard that made their house an inviting home.

  Josh thought he might be hallucinating from the heat as a familiar figure walked across the lawn in his direction.

  It couldn’t be Jenna. She wasn’t due home until tomorrow. Maybe he’d lost a day somewhere. He frantically tried to remember if he’d left any major messes in the house and concluded only his lunch dishes in the sink and yesterday’s dirty clothes on the bedroom floor could get him into trouble.

  Convinced he wasn’t seeing things and it really was his wife, he jumped over the fence and jogged across the road.

  �
��Babe.” His voice sounded husky as he swept Jenna into a tight hug and swung her around in a wide circle. He breathed in her warm vanilla scent, soaking in the sight of her. “I’m so happy to see you. You’ve been gone for half of forever.”

  Jenna laughed as he held her close, enjoying the feel of being in his arms again. There was no place on earth she liked better than in Josh’s strong and capable arms. Three weeks was too long to be away from him.

  “Oh, I bet you didn’t miss me at all.” She offered him a teasing smile when he finally set her back on her feet, feeling a little off-balance by his affectionate welcome. She inhaled his unique masculine scent, mixed with sweat and the smell of fresh cut hay. The combination was oddly appealing.

  “You have no idea how very much I missed you,” Josh said in a gravelly voice. He placed his hands on either side of her face and lowered his head, claiming her lips in a kiss that assured her how very much she was missed. “I love you so much. Always have, always will.”

  “Josh, what’s gotten into you?” She took a step back and tried to catch her breath as her heart began to beat in an accelerated tempo.

  Her training wrapped up a day early and she couldn’t wait to see Josh. She flew into Portland that morning, ran by the office to complete some required paperwork, stopped at the grocery store, then hurried home. As she drove down their road, she watched Josh slide under the swather. After unloading the groceries, she traded her business suit for a T-shirt and shorts, made a pitcher of lemonade, and started over to see if he could take a break.

  As she walked across the front yard, she was surprised he jumped across the fence shirtless and hatless. She wouldn’t ever grow tired of watching him move and work. Swarthy was the word that best described him. If he had a flowing white shirt, sash at his waist, and an eye patch, he could easily be mistaken for a swashbuckling pirate.

  Tall and muscular with olive-toned skin, broad shoulders, and narrow hips, she had mistakenly thought he was a dignified urbanite when they were dating. Little did she know that beneath those expensive tailored suits hid a finely sculpted body of someone accustomed to hard physical labor.